Treading on Water, In my hearing, in my heart.

🌊 Treading Water — In My Hearing, In My Heart

I sat with a quiet question this week:
“Am I treading water in any part of my life?”
At first, I couldn’t think of anything. My page is growing, my mornings are peaceful, my GoFundMe is slowly climbing, and I’ve been surrounded by music, coffee, and a sense of calm. It felt like I had finally reached a space of rest — and in many ways, I have.

But as I sat longer with that question, I realized something:
Just because life is moving forward doesn’t mean there aren’t parts of it where I’m still treading water.

🦻🏽The Hearing Aid Battle: One Ear at a Time

Right now, I’m struggling to hear — literally.
I’ve been using one working hearing aid, while the other one has completely stopped. Hearing has become an everyday challenge, and help didn’t come easily. The costs, the appointments, the long silences between calls — it’s been a slow climb.

But then, we found Hear USA — and they were a blessing. The kindest people I’ve met in this journey. They understood. The hearing test was fast, professional, and filled with compassion. I finally felt seen and heard, even before the aids were in place.

But even now, after all that progress, I’m still waiting.

Waiting for my counselor to approve the invoices.
Waiting for the green light so the check can be sent.
Waiting to hear clearly again.

Until then, I’m here — staying afloat with one aid that barely works, doing my best to move through the world half-hearing, fully hoping.

That, I realized, is treading water.

💔The Friendship I Let Go

And then there’s the part of me that finally admitted…
I was treading water in a friendship too.
An old one.
One I called sisterhood.
One I kept trying to rescue, even when it stopped rescuing me.

For so long, I gave it grace.
I gave it space.
I gave it another chance.
And another.
And one more after that.

But what I didn’t realize was — I was holding onto something that had already let go of me.
I wasn’t being met halfway. I was treading water all by myself, trying to keep a sinking friendship from disappearing completely.

That’s emotional treading.
That’s soul-exhaustion.
That’s what it looks like when your heart is swimming alone.

When I finally let it go, I didn’t sink.

I rose.

🌬️ The Truth About Treading

Treading water doesn’t mean you’re failing.
It means you’re trying — to survive, to wait, to believe.
It means you haven’t given up, even when the answers haven’t come yet.
It means you’re staying afloat until grace reaches you.

And sometimes, grace doesn’t look like a rescue.
Sometimes, it looks like release.

So if you're reading this, and you’re still in the waiting…
If you're holding on to something that barely works, barely speaks, barely shows up…

I see you.
You're not alone.
You're not weak.

You're strong enough to wait, and strong enough to let go.

📖 Scripture Reflection

“But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings as eagles;
they shall run, and not be weary;

and they shall walk, and not faint.” 

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